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Late Life Love: Your Aging Parents & Their Relationship Choices Family Articles | January 29, 2009 When it comes to our aging parents and their relationship choices Wholesale Marco Belinelli Jersey , we tend to pass judgment even though we totally hate the thought of them passing judgment on us for the same sorts of things. Gail offers insights and tips on this issue that can cause serious rifts in families.
When it comes to your aging or elderly parents and their relationship choices, do you think of yourself as:
* Enlightened?; or,
* At least, moderately cool?; or,
* How about, somewhat willing to give the benefit of the doubt even though you're all scrunched up inside at the very thought that they - your beloved, getting older by the moment - parents would do what you believe they're up to?; or
* Totally shut down, do not mention that in my presence Wholesale P.J. Hairston Jersey , unwilling to consider the options?
Interesting, isn't it? We pass judgement on our parents even though we totally hate the thought of them passing judgement on us for the same sorts of things. Talk about a double standard!
But, you have to admit that by our midlife perspectives, some things are tougher for us to imagine our parents doing than to imagine ourselves pulling off.
Things like .................. sex.
Things like ................... having a perfectly healthy relationship with a member of the opposite gender after losing a spouse.
Things like ................... falling in love with someone we (their children) neither know nor approve.
Did I mention things like sex?!
Of course, who do we think we are to be sticking our midlife noses into their private lives? Why, we're their kids damn it! We have a stake in this! Shouldn't weyou have first right of refusal?!
You're so funny.
Let's think about this for a moment:
- I'm not talking about extra-marital stuff here. However, if your parent has lost a spouse (i.e., you've lost one of your parents) Wholesale Miles Plumlee Jersey , they spent how many years loving - or at least tolerating - the emptiness can be incredible.
- You have your own life. Yes, you feel the loss and the hurt, but for the most part you have your own family or involvements. Remember how busy you always say you are when those same getting older by the minute parents ask for a little of your time? Umhmm, that.
- Are you really so selfish that you feel you've any business denying your remaining parent happiness? How would you feel if they did that to you? And, even if they did do that to you . . . didn't you learn anything from the experience?!
- Do I note a little fear that you might have to start sharing what you thought was yours alone (i.e., your parent) with someone else (i.e., that other person)?
- Even worse, what about your inheritance?! You don't really believe your parents' things are owed to you Wholesale Spencer Hawes Jersey , do you? And then having to share, or even worse, to sacrifice your "rightful belongings" to your parent's happiness or some such. Oh come now.
I see your point.
No, actually, I don't.
You know, relationships are strange and amazing things no matter what the ages of the participants. We get so caught up in how things ought to be done in our narrow little view of the world, that we forget we aren't the only ones living in that world. If that's how you've been living your life, come out from under your rock. Try breathing a little!
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04.03.2020 06:09
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